Phutu...the seeds of change...

5/27/2005 Much has been written about shoes since their invention some millenia ago. There's the old "if the shoe doesn't fit" and then there's "walk a mile in another man's shoes;" I'm sure that you can think of many more. But on this occasion of quitting a job that I have had for more than six years I thought it might be appropriate to write a little more about shoes.

My job is finally history. Sunday the 22nd was my final day...and out the door with my job is my pair of "work shoes." I spent around five years trudging through the dirt in them. The thing about the track was that they wanted you to look nice, but at the same time you were walking around in dirt and mud all the time. When I bought the shoes they were a matte finish leather with reddish brown tones, they had a thick sole that made them look a little like boots. They were perfectly suited, nice looking, but still rugged...or at least that was what I thought. While I worked, rugged or not, the shoes got dirty every day. Once every couple weeks I would clean them up, removing all the dirt and applying a leather conditioner; but over time the conditioner and the cleaning didn't undo what all that dirt had done. The shoes became more and more worn and tired. By the end the leather had just given up. Even with the conditioner and brown shoe polish they would only stay clean for half a day at best. Functionally there was no problem but for some reason the shoes were saying that they had had enough of all that dirt and grime. No matter how hard I tried to keep them looking good they would never look better than a grudging ok. I think my shoes are glad to go into retirement. I don't plan on keeping them, but I might donate them to Goodwill or The Salvation Army. Maybe they will find a home that is a little less abusive and survive another five years of use.

For the first couple of days of my freedom I was feeling a little lost. I did some web-based exercises designed to outline my life goals; seems kinda weird to wait until you are thirty-one to outline your life goals, but I've never felt a need before now. With the absence of a job; subsequent increase in free time; and decrease in income I feel that it is more important than ever for me to focus my energy towards things that will be productive in the long term. I tend to wander around doing little inconsequential things when I don't have a specific goal to accomplish. To that end I have decided that one way or another it is time for me to start my own business. I have had a couple ideas but nothing has really come to the forefront as being the real winner. I want to buy real estate here in the city but it is relatively expensive. I could buy property, remodel the building and sell it for profit, but this leaves one at the mercy of the ever changing San Francisco real estate market. My friend Shane did just that and is now struggling to make a sale of the building. He is considering renting it to someone. Renting is an option for him because he already owns his building and gets income off it as well...but it wouldn't be an option for me.

Bryce is doing well these days, he is consistently gaining weight now and has really started responding with smiles to Dory and I. He still gets quite fussy and even screamy from time to time...but we figure that it is because he has gas that won't come out. Usually the screaming doesn't last longer than an hour. Brian said that he thinks Bryce would make a good birth control regimine for teenagers. Take him into a high school and make people hold him while he is screaming and then see how many young parents you end up with. We had a doctor's visit today; Bryce got his first set of immunizations. It's funny how much negative information is out there about vaccines. Just do a Google search for it and you will find all kinds of information saying that they kill people and cause autism etc. The doctor and I had a bit of a chat about it and I was reassured that none of that information has any scientific backing and that most of the conclusions are based on individual cases where the onset of autism or a death could be attributed to other factors.

5/1/2005
4/15/2005
4/5/2005
3/24/2005
3/13/2005
2/5/2005
12/28/2004
11/29/2004
11/3/2004
10/2/2004
9/10/2004
8/23/2004
8/8/2004
7/21/2004
7/2/2004
6/8/2004
5/4/2004
4/20/2004
3/28/2004
3/10/2004
2/10/2004
1/15/2004

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